Everything I Know About Writing I Learned from My Cat

Perhaps you've had animals who've taught you lessons--about loyalty, love, and what's really important in life. So perhaps you can be persuaded that the title of this post, while admittedly exaggerated, is more than just whimsical.

As I write this, my dainty black cat Lucy is curled up in her fleece bed, head tucked under paw, snoring so loudly I can hear her from across the room. She has no idea how much writing advice she has given me. And of course, being a cat, doesn't care. But since we aren't cats and need to live to write another day, I thought I'd share some of Lucy's Lessons for Writers:

Be True to Your Nature: You are your own animal. Find that writing self. Don't try to be other animals. It never works. They won't thank you. And you'll feel crappy.

Staring Is Good: Observation (external, internal) is the foundation of all good writing.

Keep Your Business in the Box: Separate your writing time from your business-of-writing time. They don't mix. One is a marathon; the other a sprint. Some writers even hire people to sprint for them.

Get Up and Stretch. A Lot.: You'll breathe easier, think better, and in general be more tolerable company for all, including yourself. Corollary: While you're up, pet your cat. Repetitive motion is soothing.

Editing, Like Licking, Should Be Thorough, Though Not Obsessive: Just when you think you can't stand any more, do one more round, nose to tail (including under the hood). When you realize you're going over the same wet ground, stop.

Practice Active Napping: When you take time off, really take it off. Tuck your nose under your paw and lose yourself. Don't worry, the blank page (and maybe some ideas to fill it) will be there when you get back.

Although You Did Nothing Today, You're One Fine Specimen: Do you ever see cats express self-doubt? Wonder what they've done with their nine lives? Think they don't deserve treats? I thought not.

Happy writing.

More Good Books for Writers

Building on Sandi's recent posting and my last one, here are four excellent books on writing fiction that I frequently recommend to novelists.

Writing the Breakout Novel and Writing the Breakout Novel Workbook by Donald Maass. Clear, practical discussions and exercises for novelists, with plenty of examples. After you've done as much work on your book as you think you can, pick up a copy of Writing the Breakout Novel Workbook and do the exercises from beginning to end. I'd bet money that you'll find a way to make your novel more compelling in any number of ways.

Plot & Structure by James Scott Bell. One of the best books I've ever come across on the mechanics of plot and structure and how they interact. Extremely user-friendly.

Gotham Writers' Workshop: Writing Fiction. Each chapter in this book has been written by a different Gotham Writers' Workshop faculty member and covers a particular element of the novel--plot, character, theme, point of view, and the like. What makes this book one of my favorites: Raymond Carver's short story "Cathedral" is included in its entirety in an appendix, and is referred to repeatedly throughout the book in order to demonstrate various concepts.

Writers Can Be Touchy!

I'm the kind of person who loves magazine articles based on lists ("Ten Secrets of This" or "Seven Little-Known Tips for That") and so I devoured this Laura Miller article on Salon about five rules for writing novels. It's based, of course, on the kind of fiction Laura Miller enjoys, and so it reflects her personality and tastes, as you might expect.

Personally I found Miller's tips unobjectionable ("Make your main character want something," for example, and "A sense of humor couldn't hurt"). So I was startled by the vitriol the article attracted from some of the 117 commenters. A few examples:

"How to Write Shitty Books that will Sell--That should be the title of this article."

"This is one of the most philistine articles I've ever seen in Salon."

"This is also the advice people continually gave Tolstoy, except, you know, it turned out to be a good thing that he ignored it and went ahead to write a 1000 page masterpiece."

"Who Miller's tips leave out: Sherman Alexie, Tim O'Brien, Jeffrey Eugenides and basically every other living writer who's worth a shit to anyone outside the academy."

Wow--you'd think Miller had gone up to these would-be writers (I assume that's what they are) and personally insulted them and their work!

My meta-advice to other would-be writers: Read how-to-write articles and follow the advice they offer if you find it helpful. If not, don't. (There are plenty of other how-to-write articles that may be more to your liking.) And if you are the next Tolstoy--or even the next Jeffrey Eugenides--you will figure that out soon enough, and then you can laugh with contempt at the "rules" mere mortals find useful.

Until then, why not chill out? Most important, get back to your desk and do some more writing.